Lonely

First I have a disclaimer--- this is not a pity party, this isn't to make others feel bad for me, and it isn't to make others feel bad or guilty.

I am feeling very lonely. It's not the type of lonely which can be fixed by being with friends or family. I need Will. I was up till 3:30 this morning and awake by 7:15. This is not because I wasn't tired, I was exhausted. I just can't turn off my brain. It also isn't right to go to bed without being able to hear his soft snores coming from his room, or looking forward to his waking me in the morning--or better yet, climbing in and snuggling. Even his giggles over my reactions to his ice cold feet is missing from my life.

I know it's temporary, and I hope that it gets easier until he comes home. Cause right now, I'm not getting anything done outside of work.

I had lots of plans to clean my house top to bottom and purge unused toys and papers, but as of now, I can't even concentrate on reading more than a page in a book or watch a 1/2 hr sit com and pay attention. I know it's only been a few days so I'm cutting myself some slack. I need to start eating regular meals and drink more than coffee. My pee is now orange which I'm sure isn't all that healthy. At least I've remembered to take my mess the last 3 days. That's a step right?