Friday, November 8, 2013

Do I give up?

This blog was supposed to be a safe place for me to write about my life, out journey with autism, my MS, and life after marriage. Granted it is mostly about my son, but not always. I also liked the idea of other people who might relate to any or all of the aspects of life my son and I live with. 

What I didn't expect (maybe I should have) was that my ex would feel the need to "check up on me" and read what's not intended for him. This is my blog, I express my feelings here as my thoughts. It's a way to express myself and maybe have someone read my writings and understand, and feel like they are not alone in feeling similar to me. 

I write sometimes when I'm upset, so, I write when my feelings are strong and raw. Does this mean that everything is exactly as I write it?  Could my feelings be coloring my words?  Could there be another side to the story?  Absolutely!

I strongly agree with the saying:  your opinion of me is none of my business. 

I know not everyone feels that way, but I try to live my life with that thought in the back of my mind and remind myself of it, when I start worrying about what someone else thinks of myself. 

The person I referenced in my last post DID in fact apologize for getting upset about the piece of cardboard (after I had written the post). Just because I don't agree with certain ideas, beliefs, practices of others doesn't mean that they are bad people in my opinion, it doesn't mean they are a bad influence.  I might not like what you choose to teach, do, live but one thing does not make me hate someone, think that that one thing makes up the entire person. We all have strengths, weaknesses, good and bad. 

I might not agree with something you do, but that doesn't mean I don't applaud all the great things you do do. I think we are all human beings who do the best we can. Do I always write about that?  No, I don't.  But this is my personal blog and I should be able to safely vent with the understanding from all who read this that the intention is to speak about my feelings, while giving me the right to feel them without judgement, and it's how I feel in the moment, knowing there is always more to the story, and other sides.  How I feel today isn't necessarily how I will feel tomorrow. 

So, now I'm left with the dilemma: do I make this a private blog only for me and possibly a select few?  Or do I ignore the fall out of people being upset over possibly fleeting feelings that quite possibly aren't their business but they make it such?  This blog was never intended to hurt anyone, it is for me to express myself and possibly reach others going through similar things and help them know they aren't alone.....

No comments:

Post a Comment